I’m a pretty smart guy. Just ask my wife. She’s pretty smart too!
Awhile ago, though, I was just thinking–I’m getting older! The whole world is getting older. This has been happening all along. Why didn’t I see it? Yes. I know I’m given to distraction. I’m not always mindful. Sometimes I just zone out–as they used to say. I’m a walking experiment in Unmindfulness.
Most of the time, this doesn’t matter. I have a series of habits I engage in every day. I don’t really care much about the minutia of what is going on around me. I’m not totally tuned in as to whether my activity is in a cul-de-sac, or whether I am pushing through a dip (as Seth Godin would say in his book). I think I am probably acutely aware of when I am about to go over a Cliff. If anything, Cliff’s maybe don’t induce the sort of panic they normally would. (I’ve just gone over way to many of them).
I’m going to use my career in nursing as an example. I became a nurse in 1994. Back then, I was following in the footsteps of my mother, and taking a lead from my brother Mike, who had gone to nursing school a year or two ahead of me, and seemed exceedingly happy with his path.
Quick flash to 25 (or so) years later. Now I’m wondering did I make a mistake. Was nursing (and all things medical) a poor career choice for me? Should I maybe have looked further, and/or taken the hint that “something ain’t quite right”? Something definitely smelled fishy, but I wasn’t aware enough, or well enough, or educated enough, or comfortable enough in my own skin to see. And that is the question: why didn’t I see.
Like Paul on the road to Damascus, it took an act of God to get me to where I am now. Am I likely to emulate Paul and lead a church? No. Probably not. But having the scales removed from my eyes, and being able to see clearly, may be enough. Now. We’ll see.